When You Know, You Know
Sometimes the universe makes the decision for you
On March 1st every year, the weather changes. The wet, cold, and grey make way for sunny skies and warmer days. Springtime in Sacramento is nothing short of superb. Turning the page on the calendar and just like that, it’s sunny and 70.
March is the month of change. And for me, there’s plenty of change coming.
My son was born two years ago this month. Change is a constant for us now. Change is all I know. Just when I start to feel in the groove and I’ve got my footing, another shift knocks me off. It’s hard to convey the full range of emotions, responsibilities, and rewards that come with being a dad. But I won’t be going into all that today. The following will be about work that no longer fills you. How when you know you need to make a change, you know.
I’ve feared change most of my life. Resorting to feeling cozy in my little zone of comfort instead of taking a leap into the great unknown. Would always find a way to put off the hard uncomfortable thing and keep taking the easy predictable route. But in this latest chapter, I’ve discovered how to do what’s hard to live a life that’s worth striving for.
I’ve been doing the same thing for 11 years now. At the same company nearly 8. It’s been rewarding, fulfilling, and full of growth and development. It’s also the end of the road for me.
A couple of weeks ago, I gave my two week’s notice. Before speaking to my managing director, who is the whole reason I got my life and career back, I thought my heart was going to leap out of my chest. The conversation played out better in my head. I’m pretty sure I repeated myself, rushed through what I wanted to say, but I made sure to get the message of gratitude across. He was happy for but sad to see me go. Frustrated over just two weeks. Had a bad feeling this was coming. I held firm. I didn’t crumble. Got emotional certainly, but held it together.
I’ve been a commercial real estate researcher since January 2015. After Friday, I will be taking a week off before pivoting into a new role in a new but related industry. The career path has played out. I’ve come a long way. Doubled my salary. Several promotions. Heightened my profile. Built my reputation. But I can already touch the ceiling. There’s very little room left to grow here. I needed to find another path.
The work was also draining me. I wasn’t burned out but I pretty well checked out. The job just wasn’t doing it for me anymore. The work felt strained. Felt like a job. No longer a career. I’d had this feeling for months now. Ever since the season of panic attacks in early 2025, I’ve known for sure that I needed to move on. That season of life where my chest tightened every day I went into the office was the biggest wake up call for me. I needed to move on to something different. Something challenging. Something to get me out of this morass of stagnation. It might not be better. I might hate it. But at least I’m doing something to get out of the rut I’m in. This will be good for me, personally and professionally, no matter what happens.
Leaving is hard. Change is scary. But when you know it’s time, you know. The people I’ve worked with, the connections I’ve made make it hard. I will always cherish the time I spent here. Moving on from something I’m really good at, something I’m known for, something I have a reputation for locally, regionally, even nationally is daunting. These last couple of weeks I’ve wondered if I made the right decision. If I’m doing the right thing. All these feelings are natural. All change creates thoughts and feelings that are tough to grapple with.
There’s no knowing if you’ve made the right decision until after you’ve made it.
On the 30th, I will be moving into the healthcare industry. Still working in real estate, but closer to it. I’ll be on the real estate strategy team for one of the largest health systems in the country, managing the California portfolio. Working with market leaders, healthcare providers, and real estate teams to optimize medical offices and outpatient facilities so that it is best meeting the needs of the patients while being financially feasible for the company. Finding opportunities for expansion or consolidation in the market. Helping doctors and providers grow if need be, or understand utilization to better see how they’re using their space.
The new gig will be a much less analytical and research-focused role, and will be heavy into client-facing relationship building work. It will get me out of my heads-down research analysis report writing presentation preparing work and into more face-to-face light analysis to make recommendations kind of a job. There will be some data and number crunching but it will be a smaller part of the job. Honestly, I’m still not 100% sure on what the day-to-day will look like but I will be coming into it with an eye toward embracing that uncertainty with excitement and curiosity instead of dreading the fact that I don’t know everything yet.
I’m eager to start something new. Been going through the motions a lot lately. Ready to dive into a new role where I can prove myself again. Build on my reputation with a new team and show my new manager that he made a great decision bringing me on. I haven’t felt this way in a while. This fire burning in me will push me through this new chapter and set me up for long-term success. “It’s a dangerous business, going out your door,” Bilbo says in The Lord of the Rings. “You step onto the road, and if you don’t keep your feet, there’s no telling where you might be swept off to.” I’m ready to find out where this new road will take me.
I had to keep fending off that desire to stay put. I had to get out of my head and get out of my own way. I thought long and hard about this decision but it was an easy one to make. I knew I was meant for more. I knew I needed to do something different. I knew it was time to pivot, shift, and reorient my career.
I’ll be working remotely, though they do have an office nearby that few people go into. So that will be a change. My wife works from home too. I might need to get out of the house a couple days a week. Been working out of an office four days a week since late 2020. Working with new people makes me nervous, but there will thankfully be a couple of familiar faces.
When you know it’s time to move on, you know. When you dread going into the office. When you sigh when a new project hits your inbox. When you keep doing the same thing over and over again, getting nothing out of it. When you feel trapped but too comfortable to do anything about it.
I thought I would be at this company for a while. And I was here a good amount of time. I served my time and accomplished great things. There comes a time when you no longer feel challenged, do not see a path of growth, and know you have to make a change.
After a failed long shot at a dream job in Southern California that would have been great for me but super disruptive to my family, the universe spoke to me about a new thing closer to home.
I used to work with my new manager at the company I am at now. And he lives very close to me. In the span of a couple months, I ran into him randomly. Once at the grocery store, then at the park. I hadn’t seen him out in public like that in the five years I’ve lived in that neighborhood, even though he’s lived nearby nearly all that time. A few weeks after I saw him, I noticed the position posted and found out he was the hiring manager.
No such thing as coincidences.
I got coffee with him shortly thereafter. Was intrigued enough by the role to apply. There were delays that tested my patience, but eventually, I got the job.
We will see how it all plays out. I’m leaving a job where I am considered an expert. One of the best. Though I’m leaving that all behind, it’s not all wasted. I’m starting something new that will likely build on that.
Taking a chance on yourself and making a move to keep growing is scary. But staying stuck and stagnant is even scarier. I don’t know where this next path will lead me, however, the excitement of something new is building a fire inside me for this new chapter ahead. And I know there is a much longer runway to keep growing with this company.
I no longer fear change. I embrace it. I get after it. I get out of my own way and go where I know I need to go, especially when where I am is easier and safer.
March is the month where everything changes.
